Sunday, November 21, 2010


Yet again I have realized I have an amazing set of adoptive parents in my life. Curt texted me last night after his hockey game in High River, saying something amazing happened and he couldn't wait to tell me. Don't ask me how but I honestly just knew what had happened before he even told me. D showed up, unexpected, at Curt's hockey game last night. It was the first time he had seen D since placement. Like I have said in previous posts, D is a huge hockey fan and he took alot of steps and effort to find out where Curt was playing so that he could watch. Curts dad Ken, saw D and was shocked. He went up and said "hows that grandson of mine" and D immediately hugged him. They talked throughout the whole game, and D was so proud of Curt when he scored. He called Y to tell her! haha. He said he was going to bring Cash to watch too but he was being grumpy.. he thinks he's teething already! Curt scored a few times and felt to happy to see D in the stands. He kept the puck after the game (even though they lost haha) and wanted to give it to D to give to Cash. But he had already left by the time Curt got out there, so he didn't even talk to D! But it meant the world to Curt to see him come to one of his games, without planning it with us first. Curt plays next saturday in the place Cash lives, (almost 2 hours away from me) and D says they are coming to watch. I am planning on going too.. I haven't decided if I want Cash to be there or not. Of course I want to see him, but I don't know if at a hockey game is the best place to hold him for the first time since I placed him into Y's arms. I "accidentally" saw them when Cash was two weeks old. We were at a parade in a small town, sitting directly across from each other. I saw a little girl in pink run out into the street to grab some candy. I thought "weird, that looks like S!" and then I saw D.. and looked over to see Y holding Cash in her arms. My heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest. For the entire parade I just watched their little family from across the street. I was amazed at the level of love D showed playing with S and her cousins, and Y as she fed little Cash. Her whole family was there, and they kept coming over to look lovingly on the new addition to their family. I really feel like I was meant to see them, without them knowing I was there, to get that confirmation yet again that I made the right decision. It had happened so recently, and I was obviously still struggling with my emotions. But I didn't cry that day- I felt such peace and happiness while I looked on. I was with my best friend Karlee, and she kept telling me to go over and talk to them. I thought about it, but finally decided that I needed to give them their space and it was alright for us to leave without saying Hi. Looking back, I wish I had gone over. But I didn't know how they would react to my being so close to Cash so soon, and I didn't want to step on any toes. It was so good for me to see him, even from a distance, and feel at peace with my decision. That was all I needed! 
Anyways, I am looking forward to seeing D next weekend and talk to him about our boy. If he brings Cash I will be so excited- but if he doesn't, that is ok too. We have an open adoption, but I have just been giving them their space and waiting for them to come to me when they want me to see him. At this point, I am leaving it up to them to decide when the best time will be. It will be an amazing day, whenever it is! 


  1. I'm delurking to introduce myself. I go by RB in blogland and I'm an adoptive mom in a very open adoption with our daughter's birth mom. I respect that you are giving the family space and are kind of stepping back a bit and allowing them some time without stepping on any toes. One word of advice though... If you feel the need to connect and need an update, visit, any sort of contact, whatver, dont hesitate to pursue it. Of course Cash is the most important person in this adoption relationship, but you are extremely important too. As an adoptive mom, I am in contact with our daughter's birth mom 3x a week on average. We mainly text, and then talk on the phone for about an hour and a half every 3 weeks. She makes the majority of the contact, which I am fine with because whenever she needs an update, I'm there for her. Now though, we've built a friendship so when we text or update, our daughter is about 5% of our conversation, and the other 95% is girl talk. She is a member of our family now, as you are of Cash's family, just don't forget that. :)

  2. Wow what an amazing set of parents you found for him - they sound like they truly care about you two has the birth parents.