Thursday, February 24, 2011


I had a bad dream last night. I don't recall what the dream initially started out as, but the main idea was this: I got shot in the heart. Don't laugh, it was serious! I was trying to be protected by a group of people, but the bullet still hit me. It was almost as if I could even feel the pain of it though. My mom was trying to save me, but I woke up before I knew what happened. I looked it up online, and was interested to know what the meaning of it could be. I don't necessarily believe in all that stuff, but sometimes it makes sense. These are the different interpretations I got for my dream, and what I took out of it.

Being shot in the heart symbolizes that you have been deeply hurt emotionally, mentally or spiritually. You may dream these kinds of dreams a lot because some event, relationship or person is causing you pain. - It was interesting to me that I had this dream after writing my last blog post, in which I was very upset. I believe the event of Cash's adoption becoming final was the event that was haunting me in my dream.. I went to sleep crying and holding Cash's blanket and frog. I know I have been deeply hurt emotionally. It literally hurts my heart when I think about it. The fact that there was a group of people trying to protect me symbolizes all those who were standing there by me throughout the difficult days and trying to make my pain easier. My mother was trying to save me in my dream, just like she does every day. She does not want me to hurt, and I can tell she wishes she could have "saved" me from all I went through.  

To dream that you are shot, represents a form of self-punishment that you may be unconsciously imposing on yourself. You may have done something that you are ashamed of or are not proud of. If you are shot and come back as a different person, then it indicates that you need to start fresh. You want to wipe the past away and literally become a new person. - This is also true. Even though I have put the past behind me, I am still not proud of the fact that I became pregnant at 17. I strive daily to become a better person, and start over. 

I just thought it was interesting how much symbolism there actually is in dreams, and it got me wondering if maybe there really is something more to them than we believe. We'll see what's on my mind tonight I suppose.  Hope your dreams are better than mine were!  


  1. Dreams are the craziest things. I am definitely a believer in the notion that certain dreams have meanings. By the way.. again.. I am seriously so touched by your blog every single time I read it. It is my absolute favorite.

  2. What a scary dream. I remember when my daughter's adoption was final it was very hard on me. I didn't really knew what it all meant back then though. I thought it was final from the beginning and then when I heard it wasn't I was thinking that I could have gotten her back before that date. I was highly uneducated about adoption. Well, anyways, I think your feeling are normal. You do need to remember that Cash is your son. Adoption doesn't take that from you. He isn't yours in the way that it could have been if you had raised him but he is still your child. Don't let anyone take the right to call him your son from you.